photo courtesy of yasmine
I’m really disheartened that the focus of some Imams, after the gruesome murder of Aasiya Hassan, is on marriage mediation and conflict resolution. While I don’t have a problem with either of those, once there has been violence within a marriage, these are just not an adequate selection of options. Prophet Muhammad permitted and even presided over the divorce of Zainab from Zayd, then married her himself to remove her stigma, making her one of the most revered women among Muslims everywhere. Zainab’s reason for wanting a divorce? She didn’t like Zayd; she wasn’t in love with him. She didn’t find him attractive.
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photo courtesy of yasmine
“It’s been five days now that my family along with the rest of the community has been in shock. The fact that Muzzammil was married to my first cousin before marrying the victim still horrifies us. Ms. Zubair was his third wife. Both of his earlier wives filed divorce on the same grounds of severe domestic violence and abuses.
My cousin lived with him for only a year. Yet, it took her several years to get rid of the fear of living with a man in marriage. He was known as violent and abusive in the community.” – Zerqa Abid
First, my prayers to the late Aasiya Hassan and her family. If you haven’t heard by now, Muzzammil Hassan, the CEO of BridgesTV is accused of killing Aasiya, his wife. She had recently filed for divorce. It seems he was known to have a bad temper, and his former wives filed for divorce on the same grounds— physical abuse.
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The Arabic word, dawah, as it is used currently in mainstream Muslim circles has come to mean ‘attempting to convert people to Islam.’
Back in Syria, I lived in a house full of Muslims from all over the world. Imagine an all-male, Muslim version of the MTV reality series “The Real World,” where seven languages are spoken, and you’ve got a pretty accurate image of my life in Damascus.
When a German Christian guy who biked from Germany to Syria stepped into the house and we all came to greet him, the first thing out of my housemate Muhammad’s mouth was how much sawab or “reward” we would get if we converted him.
All I could do was laugh, but inside my head I was heaving those heaves right before a good cry. The ones that arrive when you are exhausted by dealing with a community that doesn’t seem to get it… pardon me, for my occasional negativity. I am not interested in converting people to capital I- Islam. I don’t even believe that God wants us to do that!
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One summer morning, about a year ago, I found myself in a car with a young Muslim man who had memorized all of the Qur’an. I hadn’t really hung out with a young, male Muslim teen in a while, so I thought I’d pick his brain. This was at a time when I thought I wanted to be an imam, or religious leader. Before I got a chance though, he let out a yawn.
“Man, I’m so tired. I was on the phone till four o’clock this morning.”
“Who is the girl?” I replied, smiling.
He stiffened. He thought he could slip one by me.
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If we equate a moment with a photograph, then our lives are like a series of freeze frames. Some of the best people, as told by God in the Qur’an are described as those that stay Conscious of God ( Muttaqun) during the moments that make up our lives.
So, for instance, someone who is God-conscious doesn’t just keep their camera in a bag slung around their shoulder. The one who is God-conscious actually has it out while engaging their surroundings. They experiment by viewing the reality before them through various lenses, filters, and camera-modes. They are zooming in, zooming out, and deciding what combination of lenses, filters, and modes best capture that moment. At last, they take an action. They snap the photograph. They apply the Qur’an in their lives and begin a dialogue with God.
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The Friday Khutba Series Will Start A Few Fridays From Now. (aug 26, 2010)
Thanks for your patience.
Would you like to give a khutba? Contact Us!
“O Marium! keep to obedience to your Lord and humble yourself, and bow down with those who bow.”
— Qur’an 3:43, Shakir Translation
If you haven’t already noticed, the issue of women in mosques is gaining increased attention, especially in North America.* After reading a statistic from CAIR’s Mosque Study Project (PDF) finding that only 2 of 6 million Muslims attend mosques in America, I created an informal survey in October of 2003 and posted it on my web site. I sought to test my hypothesis that many women do not attend the mosque because of their dissatisfaction with their prayer space. Often times, the space allotted to women in mosques, if there is any, is not as nice as the space provided for men. In fact, some mosques partition the women’s section off, leaving them with limited access to the imam, or prayer leader. Women’s sections that double as storage areas or basements are not uncommon. The question that lingered in my head everytime I entered a mosque was “Does the lack of women’s equalspace and accommodation in the mosque discourage them from attending?” Over the years people argued with me, suggesting that if women actually attended mosques, their prayer spaces would recieve more attention. It became a classic “What came first, the chicken or the egg?” battle.
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