Potty Humor Daw'ah

The Arabic term Daw’ah is a term that, in modern day Muslim-speak has come to describe Muslim missionary efforts. The straight up translation of daw’ah, however, refers to inviting people to God, and not “converting people” to the “Muslim Club.” I could write about this more in detail (which I may at some point), but suffice it to say I’m not a fan of “selling” islam, as much as I’m a fan of teaching by example (as horrible of an example as I may be at times). So without further ado, an example of creative daw’ah efforts. My sister Sofia flew down to Miami this past week, so she could go sea kayaking on an Outward Bound expedition. Earlier on in my life, she convinced my parents to let me go on an Outward Bound expedition in Maine when I was a depressed teen. Despite encouraging myself and others to go on one of the adventures, she never went herself. This was her chance.

But before we get to that, one common concern of people on these trips into the wilderness is, well, to put it bluntly, “Where do we poop?” On my trip we were expected to dig a hole in the dirt with our poop shovel, poop in the hole we made for pooping, and then cover it up, making sure the poop was not close to any fresh water source. I emphasize pooping because while it may not be acceptable to speak of it like this in public, it should be. Think Vagina Monologues, where everyone yells “Vagina” a few dozen times to get all cozy with the term. Go ahead, say poop. You’ll feel better. See? Yeah and thank God for it too. Cause there are some who can’t and some who go all the time. So, be thankful you do it jussssssst right. My sister’s experience with pooping out yonder (that sounded so cool I just had to type it) was just a tad bit different than my own. She, along with a group of 30-60 year old professionals had to poop in what many call a “groover” that they carried around with them till the end of the trip. A groover can come in all shapes and sizes. Sometimes they have handles on the sides (to brace one’s self), and sometimes they are just a big square box with a hole in it. Groovers also vary in poop capacity. You may be wondering where the name “groover” came from. Wonder no more. Back during the early days of rafting, they sat directly on rocket boxes, and they left grooves on their bums. Cute. Sofia's group’s groover happened to be a white plastic box with a screw on black cap. One would hover above it, and aim as best as they could. Unless they had weak knee and thigh muscles, in which case, they were grooved. During the first day of my sister’s expedition, the group was told that the first one to use the groover had the privilege of naming it. Sofia, praise God, was the first. The next morning during breakfast, a few participants expressed excitement; they had heard that the Groover had been used and a name had been decided upon. Clearing her throat, my sister announced that the word “jihad” had been misused by the media and other mainstream outlets as “Holy War.” In fact jihad as many Muslims understand it is the internal struggle, for example, against one’s ego, and since “we are all going to struggle collectively to poop in the groover, we will call it the 'Jihad Pot.'” And now about a dozen people will never forget what that essence of jihad is. Imagine the conversations they may have, imagine the reading it may have sparked! Sure, it may be offensive to some, but I find that humor and sharing one’s own personal experience is the best way to give advice and/or “daw’ah” without sounding preachy. She did just that.

Epilogue: The Jihad Pot, or The JP as it was affectionately called was filled to capacity after only the 5th day, and so the alternate method is to use a horse shoe crab shell, and ”shit-put” (as opposed to shot-putting) it out into the ocean. I’ve been informed that if you bury it in sand, there is not enough organic matter in the sand to break down the excrement, so it just dries up.