To The Man Who Is Smelling

A few weeks ago I was listening to EBC Radio, 1060 AM out of New Jersey. It’s a South Asian station, playing a range of old hindi classics, and some newer things, like Rabbi Shergil. They also have call-in shows, from reading horoscopes to real estate. The particular program I listened to was targeted towards South Asians in the area who wished to sell their homes. Half way through the program, a young man called in and gave some wonderful (and funny advice). Note: All of this should be read with a South Asian accent

“Hello, Hello, you’ve reached EBC Radio, what is your question?”

“Actu-ali, I’m having comment… vhen you are showing the house, our community, we should not be cooking before, these outsiders are not used to the smell of cooking and things, and it is smelling.”

insert DJ laughter “You are making the good point,” more laughter “This is right, try not to cook before you show your house, especially these things like curry, as this smell might turn away the people.”

Then came another caller, wishing to comment on the previous comment…

“Hello, next caller, you are on the air!”

“Hello, I am vanting to comment to the man who is smelling?”

“This topic is closed sir, no, no, you can call back after the show…”

The DJ tried to cut him off, but to no avail:

“Okay, but vhat im really vanting to say it is…. BUY SOME CANDLE!”